Thursday, September 22

As we wait for next Monday’s big brawl,
Let us sip pumpkin-spice alcohol,
Say goodbye to the summer
(What a climate-change bummer),
And look fearfully forward to fall.

Pas Très Jolie
It is done. Angelina and Brad
Are not one “Brangelina.” It’s sad.
Now they’re two. Now they’ve split:
Ms. Jolie. Mr. Pitt.
No more Pitt-Jolie hyphen. Too bad.

The thermometer read 97 degrees in New York City last week. The trees are still lush and green. But autumn is well under way—at Starbucks. The day after Labor Day marked the advent of pumpkin spice latte season, that time in late summer when we’re encouraged to start fetishizing all things fall (fireplaces, sweaters, pumpkin-spiced anything) and collectively just believe in the coffee shops’ suggestive red-and-orange decor. Just as Gatsby believed in the green light at the end of Daisy’s dock.